Sunday, April 15, 2012

Cause and Effect

Day 106


Cause and effect. Action and reaction. I feel sad so I buy shoes. It's the cycle that propels us to move forward, and sometimes to remain in a dangerous loop. This is the second of three reasons that I buy (or over-buy) clothes and shoes. At the root, we have to protect ourselves form the elements, therefore we buy clothes and shoes.I suppose we could wrap ourselves in whatever is available but a Patagonia jacket is the preferable choice when it's chilly. It's cold, we cover up.


I feel blue so I shop for an outfit to perk myself up. This is a leap from protection from the elements, but it feels a lot the same. I feel fat so I shop for an outfit to make me feel thinner. I feel thin so I celebrate by finding an outfit to show that off. I am overworked and reward myself with shoes. I am bored so I seek out the perfect shoes. Stress = dress. Blue = shoe. Hurt = shirt. This all equals dangerous loop. This reasoning is the same as saying, I am hungry so I buy a sweater (although I have used the reasoning that I have denied my hunger by being on a diet therefore I should have a new sweater). Something about buying things feels so good. I won't even venture a psychological hypothesis, I can just say it is real.


By challenging myself to end the purchasing of clothes and shoes, I felt like I was ending the emotional reaction to whatever I was feeling. Funny thing- just because the reaction is gone, the action remains. I still feel sad sometimes, stressed sometimes, proud sometimes. I am finding other, hopefully more productive ways to react (that don't include donuts). Once again, it's a good thing this is a year long challenge because this action-reaction pattern has been 50 years in the making and isn't going to fade easily.I am getting very crafty though ...

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