Friday, January 18, 2013

Colored Jeans

Colored Jeans

For two years now, retailers, magazines and fashion gurus have been singing the praises of commanding that we all get colored jeans. It's subtle, sure, but it's a command. They are EVERYWHERE!! I have been so tempted. I love color and they seem to come in every conceivable shade. I have tried a few pairs on but if they are snug, flaws are magnified times 50. I was at Sam's Club today and they had these exact red Bandolino jeans, in my size, marked down (the pain ...) to $12.91. I seriously considered them because the style is not super tight. I even carried them around for a while.

I have purposely, carefully examined shoppers everywhere I go to determine just how many people wear colored jeans and how many look good in them. Frankly, I haven't seen many actual people wear them. Frankly, frankly, few people over 21 or over 110 pounds look good in them. One exception: our friend Sheila rocked some red jeans and looked fantastic. Besides Sheila, not too much.

Still, I love red (my signature color) and they had my size ... STOP.
First clue. On clearance and they had my size. This indicates that very few, if any have sold at Sam's Club. Then I asked myself, "what would I wear with red jeans?" I decided I would have to buy a bunch of tops ... (warning, danger, abort! abort!)
Finally, I stepped over to a mirror and held them up. I looked like Sue Heck. (Sue Heck is a hilarious character on the ABC sitcom, The Middle.) In other words, I looked like a nerdy high school girl. I simply can't get past the notion that colored jeans = Sue Heck.
I strongly suspect that this is why so many stores still have so many pairs, and why they are on clearance.

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